Autortiesības dažādas, daudzas nezināmas. Atrasts webā (gan ziza.ru, gan fotOblog.lv un citur). Ak jā, kaķi dominē (catsrulz)!

Skaties vairāk!

uzgāju vienu un tad otru un noteikti ir vēl :D labās!!!

pedeja ņemta no http://www.avatarmovieblog.com

un, protams, kur spilgts citāts, tur seko remix :D

http://emuars.lv/2009/10/15/aizver-muti-ingmars-lidaka/ (video)

http://lasi.lv/0kseg (video)

http://yy.lv/upload/index.php?ACT=4&f=77063&ext=MP3 (mp3 fails)
tas pats, tikai ar video:

un vēl biki par Līdaku! :D http://fanis.lv/blog/15/10/2009/ka-lidaka-stures-ta-buldozers-brauks/ (video, foto)

T-krekls (via @raikons)

fotozhaba šeit: http://iblog.lv/2009/10/lidaka-aizver-muti-fotozaba/

Oda Ingemāram Līdakam!

Draudzīgajos tirgo arī zvana melodijas :D  (via @krizdabz )
 http://www.screencast.com/users/krizdabz/folders/Jing/media/8a6130c8-d15a-42df-825d-fb22b7573343

un pēdējākais joks :D (via @inchainjix) :

Mamma prasa meitai- Kā saka sunītis? -Vau, vau. Un kaķītis?! -Ņau, ņau! Un līdaciņa.? -Aizver muti!

Pēdējās ziņas:

saņēmu no kolēģa dažus jocānus (eng) , izklausās autentiski un nenormali smieklīgi imho :D  here we go:

“TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.” “Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?” “Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: “I’m f…ing bored!” Ground Traffic Control: “Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!” Unknown aircraft: “I said I was fucking bored, not fucking stupid!”

Control tower to a 747: “United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o’clock, three miles, Eastbound.” United 239: “Approach, I’ve always wanted to say this…. I’ve got the little Fokker in sight.”

A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich, overheard the following:

Lufthansa (in German): “Ground, what is our start clearance time?”

Ground (in English): “If you want an answer you must speak in English.”

Lufthansa (in English): “I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany. Why must I speak English?”

Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): “Because you lost the bloody war!”

Novice female military controller to US bomber leaving radar coverage, forgetting the correct terminology… “You are entering my dark area”

US Bomber: “WHOOPEE!”

One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said,

 ”What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?”

The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: “I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like yours and I’ll have enough parts for another one.”

The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign: Speedbird 206.

Speedbird 206: ” Frankfurt , Speedbird 206! Clear of active runway.”

Ground: “Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.”

The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.

Ground: “Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?”

Speedbird 206: “Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now.”

Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): “Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?”

Speedbird 206 (coolly): “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, — And I didn’t land.”

Tower Controller: “BA356, proceed to stand 69″

BA: “Yes, Sir, Nose in or Nose out?

Allegedly, while taxiing at London’s Gatwick Airport, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: “US Air 2771, where the hell are you going?! I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it’s difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!” Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: “God! Now you’ve screwed everything up! It’ll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don’t move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?” US Air 2771: “Yes, ma’am,” the humbled crew responded. Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: “Wasn’t I married to you once?”

Lufhansa Pilot to co-pilot, forgetting that the frequency was open: “We used to come up the Thames, and turn over here for the docks….”

Voice on frequency: “ACHTUNG SPITFEUR”

• asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
• Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
• Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
• We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
• We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
• Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
• Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
• Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
• The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
• Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
• Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
• My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
• Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
• A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
• If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.
• Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
• If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
• I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks
• I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian